The Benefit of Relationship: An Introvert’s Perspective

Honestly, sometimes I don’t want to make new friends. People are inconsistent and subject to change at any moment.

And I don’t know if I’m ready for that level of rejection again. I think its a combination of my insecurities and past experiences.

Let me explain, I have always been quiet and as a result found myself alone. When I was younger it was because I didn’t have many friends. Now I know its because I relish the company of myself above all else. And it’s this charade of in-dependency that plagues me most. Tall-tale attributes of an introvert are shy and lonely however that just isn’t true.

In fact, inter-dependency is what I actually crave. What my past taught me is true: relationships are sticky situations. But that doesn’t mean I should avoid them.

The beauty of interdependence is that it doesn’t rest solely on me – it requires another.

I tend to put on airs as if I have it all together and I don’t need anyone’s help. But the only problem is that it isn’t true. To me, ‘needing someone’ is a sign of weakness. And I’m not just talking about relationships, friendships as well.

I want to be friendly but not vulnerable. Because vulnerable=weakness.

And its the combination of these beliefs that leave me wanting. And as much as it contradicts my so-called beliefs I know God has called me to something greater than a life full of me.

Since day one, He told me that I wasn’t any good alone. Genesis 2:18

Then, He said I needed friends to improve. Proverbs 27:17

He whispered to me that two are better than one. Ecclesiastes 4:9

Truth is, relationships are what drives me. I wouldn’t be who I am with my specific proclivities, personality and perceptions if not for the people who matter most to me.

I may not be the best communicator or conversationalist. I may not be the life of the party but I at least show up.

And that’s the hardest part – showing up.

But (I love when I see this word. It always means a change is coming!) I am too young to be defeated by life already.

So I choose to be an introvert who possesses an extrovert’s attributes, a flawed person seeking out other flawed persons. I choose to view relationships as a beautiful exchange. Because ultimately, we all need someone.

9 thoughts on “The Benefit of Relationship: An Introvert’s Perspective

  1. In some ways it’s easy for me to make new friends because I’m a multi-cultural person who has had to move many times. Some third culture kids go the other way and decide never to make friends again because the good-byes are too painful. I decided years ago that I’m willing to be vulnerable because even if I experience pain in betrayal, it was worth being loved while I was close to that friend. When it is a Christian friendship, that person uses their spiritual gift with you the most, and you are built up.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “At least I show up” YES! That’s me too. I’m also very much an introvert and I’ve had to come to grips with the fact that I need relationships and I need to be social (even when I don’t want to) but I just have to come to it all with the realization that it takes a lot of work and energy for me. But it’s worth it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “Now I know its because I relish the company of myself above all else. ” Me! Me! Me! Me all the way sis! But, I completely resonate with this post. Your honesty is breathtaking and to be honest, I thought I typed this myself lol! We are soul sisters lol

    Liked by 1 person

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